Humor me with a quick flashback to November 2010: LadyP was 2 months old and I was waging a wild and desperate war on frumpy postpartum mommyhood. Those of you who’ve followed my humble ramblings from the beginning of my momventure will remember my fluffy hot pink purchase (aka my FIRST fab-find after baby #1 was born). Earlier this year, I relived the memory of it all on MommyLITE. I’ve even ranted, raved and bragged about wearing these spicy kicks to a toddler’s birthday party.
This past weekend, I discovered that I don’t really need ‘em anymore. I WANT them, but I don’t need them. Insert tears here. Or celebrate.
You see, when I bought them, I NEEDED them. I NEEDED the illusion of youth, fabulousness and frivolity that they made me feel. I NEEDED the rush of glee that the fluffy pink feathers provided just by existing at the tip of my toes whenever I looked down. I NEEDED to hang on to that free-wheeling girl that would’ve worn these puppies poolside in Vegas. (I already told you how I wore them to a toddler’s birthday party, didn’t I?) But when I tried them on (while trying to decide what to wear to a friend’s wedding), they suddenly looked slutty to me. I shouldn’t say slutty…. SILLY. They looked SILLY to me. Maybe I shouldn’t have tried to pair them with a black dress. The whole thing looked so “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world.” Either that or “I dance for the Pussycat Dolls” (which I guess isn’t a bad thing, but not for the wedding I was going to). Hubby seemed doubtful. “Maybe you should take that flower off of them… I think that’s the problem.” ?!?!?!?!? No way. (That’s why I bought them, hellloooo.) Even LadyP looked me up and down, and she loves anything in hot pink. (LilMiss seemed to think they were ok, but she smiles at everything.)
So I made a swift executive decision: No hot pink fluffies for the wedding. And I was fine with it. No feelings of UNfabulousness at all. I’ve still only worn them ONCE (to that toddler’s birthday party). Will I wear them again? Maybe. Maybe not. Because I don’t NEED them anymore to feel fun and fab… I (GASP!) feel fun and fab pretty much every day now when I see how LadyP gets such a kick out of playing in my closet and picking out my shoes for me… and how LilMiss giggles and giggles when I bounce her in front of the mirror… and when Hubby says “You look hot” as he unsuccessfully tries to zip my turquoise pencil dress that won’t zip up anymore. So, Pink Fluffies, I will wear you someday again, but only when the time, outfit and event is right… and I will wear you when I WANT to, without feeling like I HAVE to. How mature of me. But I wonder: would I have gotten to this place in my head if I never bought them in the first place? Probably not.
Now if I can just zip this dress up like I used to… HELP.
WHAT DO YOU THINK: AM I LETTING FABULOUSNESS SLIP AWAY? WOULD YOU HAVE WORN THE PINK FLUFFIES?